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#GirlTalk

Posted on 03 Aug 2018 @ 8:42pm by Civilian Rebecca Sharpe & Civilian Caroline Hatfield

Mission: Character Development
Location: Rebecca and Caoline's Room

Caroline remained quiet on her bed. She was almost done with her book and she was desperate to have it done so she could go see Max and tell him how much she had fallen in love with the book. Her young heart was about to burst with all of the emotions the book had stirred up inside her even though she had no idea what to do with them. She had been reading about different marriages and their various states of unhappiness during a time where she was questioning her own crush’s feelings towards her. And she had been surrounded by new and established couples who were head over heels in love with each other. Was it jealousy? Was it desire? Was she starting to get those natural feelings every normal teen is supposed to feel?

The clanking of the items being shuffled around brought her back to the moment. She looked over to Rebecca who seemed a little tense during what should be an incredibly exciting time. Rebecca was going to have her own place! She was going to be able to party and be loud and do things with her girlfriend without having to worry about being overheard by unapproving ears. But Rebecca had barely spoken to Caroline ever since Richard approved of Caroline getting her own place as well. While she tried to not let it hurt her since Rebecca has been acting rather abrasively to everyone around her, it certainly stung to know that her sister was mad at her.

Sitting up, Caroline placed her PADD down and crossed her legs on the bed. “Are you okay, Beck?”

Rebecca dumped down a stack of books on the desk, perhaps a little harder than was strictly necessary, and turned to look at Caroline. "Don't l look okay to you?" She asked, somewhat firmer than she would've liked. She wasn't even sure why she was being cranky towards Caroline, it wasn't like she'd done anything to her. Richard was the douche-bag, not Caroline.

"Sorry Caz." She said, a little softer this time. "Just got a lot on my mind at the moment. I shouldn't be taking it out on you."

Caroline tilted her head to the side. "Are you mad that he's letting me move out too?"

"That, and his reaction to my wanting to join the marines." She sighed, and sat down on her bed, looking at her sister. "I begged for my own place for ages, and he always said 'You have to be 18'. I finally become 18, and I finally get my own place. You ask once and you're not even 18, and he gives you your own place. Only difference, that Amaya woman's now here, so of course she means he wants the place to himself. Presumably for all that... 'adult stuff' that he clearly doesn't believe I'm already doing." She rolled her eyes.

Caroline's lips twitched up a bit. "I'm pretty sure everyone on this side of the Promenade knows you and your girlfriend are doing it."

"Gee... thanks." Rebecca rolled her eyes. "Doesn't mean I'm not angry at him for letting you get your own place so soon."

"Beck, I was the one who asked him for it. And I asked him because I want him and Amaya to have their own space here. I didn't want to be a burden on them." She let out a sigh. "And, honestly, do you really think you would survive in the Marines? You go running and screaming whenever you see a small bug under your bed."

"I don't know what else to do with myself!" She replied, frustratedly. "I've always been proud of my big brother, and I thought I could do what he did. But he was so angry about it! I thought he'd be proud that I wanted to follow him, let the marines improve me."

Caroline shook her head. "Back in my universe he told me he would kill me if I joined the Marines. So it's not just you. Besides, do you really want to do something where you have to deal with all of that death and brutality every single day? I worked as a Nurse's Assistant back home and as much as I want to help people I don't think I need to see another person's guts spread out on a table." She stood up and moved over to Rebecca. "Don't get me wrong. I'm really proud of what Richard does and has done in the Marines. You seem more like a person who would be into traveling and designing and stuff. You're always going off about clothes and trying to get me to dress in whatever item is in style, even if it makes me look like I'm trying to get boys to like me."

"I'm trying to make you feel better about yourself." Rebecca sighed. "I wanted you to feel like you were a girl, not just a human. I only wanted you to feel right about yourself, and yes, even your own sexuality. I know you're a wall-flower, Caz. I'm not trying to make you something you're not, but I also wanted to pull you out of your shell a bit. That's all I was doing. I don't think I'm a designer or anything like that."

Caroline plopped down on Rebecca's bed next to her half-packed box. "I'm happy, Rebecca. I live in an amazing universe and I have you guys who've helped me adjust to living here. I feel right about myself. Just because we don't always like the same things doesn't mean that I'm not a bad person or I'm not happy. It doesn't really make me feel good when you make fun of me in front of everyone. That's not exactly going to make me want to hang around you if all you're going to do is call me boring or pathetic."

Rebecca looked at her. "I thought it was playful teasing..."

Caroline shook her head slowly. "You didn't make it sound like you were teasing. And you never told me you were just joking. I've never made any personal 'jokes' like that to you. You can't force me to be someone I'm not, Beck, like I can't expect to force you to sit down and read a 1,000 page novel with me."

"No, I think that'd be asking a bit much." Rebecca replied. "I didn't mean to hurt you Caz. I hope you know that." She said, putting a hand on her sister's hand. "I might not say it enough, or display it, but I do love you and care for and about you, as my sister. You might not be blood, but you're family."

Caroline nodded. "I love you too, Beck. Sometimes I think you forget there's a world outside of what's going on in your head. There's a world outside of partying and hooking up." She smirked at Rebecca. "I think Richard is just trying to understand why you've been so mean to everyone when they've been there for you and make sure you're safe."

"I honestly don't know." Rebecca sighed, and fell back so she was lying across the bed. "I just - I get it into my head that I need to say or do something, or it just comes out before I can react. I know I don't want to say or do the things I'm doing, but I still do it. Hannah's been trying to get me to stop, but I honestly don't know why I say or do the things I do."

Caroline laid herself down next to her and gazed up at the ceiling. "You don't always have to say or do anything. Maybe try and think for a moment if it's something that would hurt you if someone said it or did it to you."

"Problem is, I don't always mean to hurt someone with what I say." Rebecca said. "I just say it. Or my brain engages well after my mouth has said it. Hannah calls it 'foot in mouth syndrome' or something like that."

Caroline gave her sister a nudge on her shoulder. "Why don't you try slowing down your mind a bit? Baby steps, like work on thinking before you speak. You can do it, it's not something that's impossible. It just takes a lot of work. And I don't like seeing you argue with Richard and Phil our aunts and uncles."

Rebecca smiled and turned her head to look at her sister. "When did you become the wise big sister type?" She joked, and gave Caz a peck on the forehead. "Thanks hun, I appreciate the support."

"When Aunt Annie became a detective she started reading all of these psychology books. Phil and I went over there one night for dinner and I just started looking at them. They're really interesting." She let out a short giggle. "Yet I still don't know if Max likes me that way."

"Pfft, he's a guy, you're a hot girl, what's not to like?" Rebecca said, grinning. "But, with you, you're very shy. I'd normally suggest just coming out and asking him. I mean, do you like him in that way?"

Caroline sighed longingly. "I do like him. He's really smart and really funny. Uncle Paul and Uncle Matt really like him. He's also really cute... I just don't want to rush anything, you know? I don't even know what I would do anyway." She then looked quickly over to Rebecca. "And I don't need you to give me any tips. I'm sure I'll figure it out in one of those books."

"Books can only teach you so much, but hey, up to you." Rebecca said. "I've not exactly had a whole string of boyfriends, thanks to certain relatives."

Caroline sat up. "I think I would rather have those guys around than someone who only wants one thing." She looked over at her PADD. "They are just so romantic and have swept Aunt Archie and Aunt Sully and Aunt Annie and Amaya off of their feet." She turned back to Rebecca. "Do you think we'll be able to find people like that?"

"I already did." Rebecca smiled at her sister. "But, there is no reason at all why you can't find a nice guy who'll treat you like you're the centre of their entire universe. For every jerk, there's a great guy waiting in the wings. I think you can spot the jerks a mile off, and not just because of our uncles and aunts. You grew up in a very hostile world that most guys were jerks in."

"Actually, most everyone. Amaya in my time actually ordered Richard to have me executed just because she wanted to." Caroline stood up, feeling uncomfortable with talking about her old life. "I should let you pack. That way you can go see Hannah sooner."

"Doesn't mean I don't want to see you." Rebecca said, attempting to get up with a modicum of decorum, since she was in a short skirt. "I'd really like it if you came to visit." She said, looking at her sister with hopeful eyes.

Caroline really wanted to finish the book so she could see Max tomorrow. But Rebecca never asked her to hang out with her. “Sure, if you want me to. I’ll just finish my book when I get back.”

Rebecca smiled. "Let's just make today all about us. Renewing what was broken."

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